These days I go to the gym. In fact today was the 6th day from 7 that I'd shown up, and one of the upsides in my newfound sobriety and personal determination, has been that the gym offers me an unprecedented opportunity to listen to music ... and submerge myself deep into it.
With that level of focused immersion comes epiphany. I have a broad range of music that I love, but what drives me in the gym is intensity. Today I realised that whilst this particular offering from KORN or this majestic effort from Slayer may be obvious favourites on my personal playlist, it was when this amazing piece from Arvo Part began playing today that I felt supercharged with intensity. The peace, quiet and serenity was as heavy, crushing, and as powerful as the loudest noise.
My second epiphany of the day was how music connects the enlightened soul on an absolutely primal level, and how different layers / levels of emotion are inextricably linked in ways we barely comprehend. I was on the workout bench, lost in a world of muscle burn and physicality, happily lost in sound ... and then this Spiritualized track started playing at which point the most powerful, visceral sense of time and space overcame me and I was literally transported to my mother's deathbed 16 years ago. I was there.
As I lay on the bench, tears came almost instantaneously. I was there. I was saying goodbye.